The Kingdom belongs to such as these Part II

Here is the second half of my hike onto the wilderness of the San Gabriel mountain range last month. Such a powerful time. I pray that this story inspires you to go out an meet God.

Meeting God

I had not intention of rock climbing this day do I set off to the east. Having spied a curious fireplace and stone chimney in the middle of a weed covered plain, I wanted to see what this was all about. I hiked across the plain and ran out of trail. The challenge now was to go down across the plain blazing my own trail. Knowing that this is the home of wild animals, poisonous spiders and snakes I quickly changed into hiking boots for the rest of the journey.

I traversed several hundred yards of uneven weed covered ground and in the midst of this time the Lord came to me. It was a gentle sense that came upon me that as much as I was enjoying this time with him he was with me. He made me to love the out doors he made me to experience the wonder of exploration. It was as if he was encouraging me onward into this journey of discovery. He brought to mind a verse from Mark 10:14.

Let them come to me for the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these.

The Lord had shared with me his delight at seeing how the child in me found such wonder in this journey to be with him.

A Lone Chimney

I arrived within two hundred yards of the chimney only to find my path blocked by a trench. Recent rains had carved a ten foot deep and six foot wide chasm in the earth. It would be stupid to jump and even dumber to try to climb down and up its sheer sides. I set off to find an easier crossing. About five hundred yards downhill I found a spot where the chasm had broadened out, this provided a much shallower crossing. I jumped across and hiked back up the other side. This may seem rather inconsequential but by then I was over two hours into this hike chilled to the bone and 40 hours into my fast, climbing back up the slope was not something I wanted to do. Curiosity and wonder on this trip would be indulged.

I do not know still what to make of the fireplace. I could imagine it the hearth of an early settler to the area. I could imagine it being built by a grape farmer to ward off the chill of an early morning in his vineyard. I could imagine many a story of what this was. The facts though said that it was a solitary fireplace built of river rock and mortar. It was elevated from the ground though erosion could have made it only appear so. There was no foundation around it for a building of any sort. Could this have been built for camp outs? I don’t think so for the imprint of rafters and joists were clear in the mortar above the fire place. This used to be a building but what?

Again I prayed, perhaps this fireplace was a witness to something I would never know. Perhaps it was simply a signpost for me on my journey and I would know no more of it. I prayed for the saints, I prayed for those who stood up and were persecuted for Christ. I praised my Heavenly Father.

Rivers of Living Water

I continued on east, traversing the slope. I found a trail again and the going was easier yet not easy. I listened to the wind cutting through the hill across the plain and could almost here God whispering to me. After some time the ground once again became familiar and as it did so I recalled a sight on this part of the slope that had previously captivated me.

This area is truly a desert. We get only a few inches of rain per year mostly in January-February. What captivated me was that in the fall I found a mountain stream cutting through a deep valley. From the time I first saw it I knew I must visit it and today was the day.

Worship

I reached the edge of the valley and surveyed the scene below. From where I stood to the valley floor was a drop of about 100 feet, relatively steep and covered with small trees. A hike down would be difficult perhaps but not impossible. I climbed down extremely carefully. To fall and be injured in this place could mean a not so silent night amongst the stars. I reached the bottom climbed across the rocks to the stream. I remain amazed at the beauty of nature that our Lord has provided. A cold mountain stream cutting into a barren desert waste land, how could this be? Regardless I found a spot beside the cool waters and sat down. I soaked in Gods majesty in this beautiful place. I pulled out my bible and began to read in earnest. There were three psalms that came immediately to mind 121, 23 and 46. I read each aloud carefully and slowly, soaking in each word as I did so. I read from Revelation 22 about streams of living water and then I prayed. This was my worship session, such a powerful time with the lord. I played Jeremy Camp’s Empty Me and Chris Tomlin’s Strength Will Rise then I prayed again.

I praised my Heavenly Father in song, in prayer and in silence and wonder. I praised him for the beauty of this place. Before I left I took a page out of the Old Testament. I stepped across the stream and upon a large rock I set up a small monument to my Heavenly Father. Four stones, a large flat stone with a pile of two atop each other on one end and a single stone on the other. For here I met God and sat at his feet.

I will return to this place sometime soon. Will the monument be there? Perhaps, perhaps not, what will be there though is the image in my heart of the day the Lord and I met and went for a hike together in his wilderness.

Father thank you

Thank you for meeting me

Thank you for watching over me

Thank you for guiding my fast, for honoring my desire to meet you

Thank you for revealing to me our shared love of your creation

Thank you for being my father

Thank you for being

I know that you are God

Thank you for helping me to be still long enough to find you

Thank you for streams of living water

For life in a seemingly dead place

For safety in a dangerous land

Thank you father

In your son’s victorious name I pray

Amen

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, your mind, your soul

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” The second is this: “Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these." Mark 12:29-31

If you have been a Christian for any length of time, you have no doubt heard this well known verse. It echoes through the halls and rafters of churches throughout the world. After the great commission and John 3:16 this has got to be the most famous of verses in the bible. Yet for all the time I have known this verse its meaning has always seemed so obvious to me. That is until about 5 weeks ago when our pastor used it in discussing authentic Christian relationships.

Maybe you already get this, but in the past I looked at this verse and saw the instruction to love God and to love your neighbor only. The neighbor part can be difficult at times especially when someone wrongs you, but the message is clear. Love your neighbor anyway. In fact there is another verse that says very clearly to treat your enemy with kindness, no mistaking the instruction right?

Well there was a nuance in the words that our pastor pointed out which was not previously clear. Love your neighbor how? Love them as yourself? WOW!

Do you love yourself?

In my last post I mentioned that I was going to pray about why I struggle with Christmas. The Lord very clearly gave me this verse as an answer to my prayer. I will explain.

What exactly does it mean to love yourself in a Christian context?

Do you accept yourself for who you are? Do you wish you were taller, better looking, richer, more eloquent, more healthy, less lonely?

At various times in my life I have struggled with some of these. As a leader I know that physical appearance inexplicably matters. To be six foot instead of five foot ten, to be charismatic and energetic in a room of strangers. I would be lying if I said I did not sometimes want this. To not have to deal with the uncertainty of life and be financially secure wouldn’t that relieve some stress. Heck I have always dreamed of being a professional hockey player too, lets through that old bone in!

These wants and dreams are not who I am in Christ. My heavenly father made me in his own image, he knew me before I was born. He had plans for me!

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Who am I to imply through selfish desire that the Lord’s design for me is imperfect? An arrogant ungrateful ignorant fool perhaps. Who am I not to embrace who he made me? Who am I not to discover who I am in Christ and live it for all I am worth? Who am I to selfishly consider myself over his creation?

Well who am I? I am a child of the most high God, created in his own image, designed for a purpose, made to love and worship my heavenly father, made to serve his people. As I have discovered and grown in the gifts he has bestowed upon me, I have learned not only to accept myself for whom I am but to marvel at how wonderfully the Lord put me together for his purpose in my life. The closer I get to his purpose in my life the more joy I feel in my being.

So I accept myself but Love?

Well yes it gets a bit complicated here for me. Emotion and empathy are not my strong suit, yet the Lord has been growing these in me steadily. I have come to embrace who I am and find joy in being who I was made to be. The more joy I feel the stronger the positive emotions I feel about myself.

There is another side to this though. I have come to see where I am weak, where I am challenged. While I still dislike these aspects of myself, in the past there was shame, disgust, embarrassment and many other negative emotions. The Lord has revealed to me that the areas I am weak, the areas I struggle, they too have a purpose. When I hear of someone who fails publicly in areas I struggle I have empathy not judgment and condemnation. I have a strong desire to minister to others and love them because of my struggles not in spite of them.

But he was pierced for our transgressions,

he was crushed for our iniquities;

the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,

and by his wounds we are healed. Isaiah 53:5

In some small way I think this is similar to what Christ did for us. I believe we are called to take on the burdens of others, to help them through their pain, just as Isaiah prophesied Jesus would.

Forgiveness

A key piece of this love puzzle is this concept of forgiveness. We cannot truly love ourselves and hate ourselves at the same time. So when we behave in some way that contradicts who we are we must confess it to the Lord to receive his forgiveness and we must forgive ourselves also. After all our sin was nailed to the cross of our savior, who are we not to forgive ourselves.

So I have learned to love myself. I accept who I am, I embrace God’s gifts in me, I use my weakness for God, and I forgive myself.

When I live this model well my ability to love others increases and my desire to spend time with others also increases. When I stumble the exact opposite happens, I detach and desire distance from others.

Christmas

When I was a boy the real meaning of Christmas was a mystery to me. My focus at the time was on the presents, I am not proud of this, embarrassed actually. The thing is I knew the Christmas story early on, it was told each year in mass. The story never came to life for me though; it was simply an elongated gospel reading that prolonged the time away from my new toys and stuff. As I grew the story did not change much. It always seemed that the commercial aspect of Christmas trumped the spiritual but then I had an unstable foundation. In the renaissance of my faith I have a strong yearning to connect with Christ, to put him in his rightful place at the center of Christmas.

So you see there are significant forces that always seem to steal the joy of Christmas. (Or said more correctly there are forces that I allow to interfere with my Christmas experience. I am responsible here, no victims allowed!) First my own weak sense of experience in a joyful meaningful Christmas and second my tendency to withdraw when faced with parts of me I don’t like. So each year I enter into the season as a broken record hoping for a better result and unclear how to change the experience. The result: yet another disappointing Christmas.

It is often said the first step in learning is to become aware of what we previously could not see. Is the greatest commandment the answer to a joyful Christmas? Yes I think so. I must love God fully and all the while love my neighbor as myself.

Merry Christmas

After more prayer and thanksgiving I expect this will be a different Christmas for me.

Father I praise you

for your Son

for you word

for revelation

for Christmas

for the greatest gift ever given

I praise you

amen

Ron

What is your story? Part II

Today I will continue on with points 4 and 3. Again this is a story that God is revealing to me real time. I share it with you as is becomes clear to me. It is a story of maturation in Christ and a story of love and faith. It is a story that will allow me to become even more resolute in doing God’s will with love and humility in this world. One day I will walk across the room to a stranger, a non believer and ask in love, if he knows our Savior Jesus.

Acts: Point 4

Last Tuesday morning I was hit with a profound revelation. Those of you strong in your faith will find this to be rather obvious. No doubt a duh!!! might be thought or even spoken. But all of us have moments where even the most elegantly simple concept has mystified us for some time only for us to finally get it. The Holy Spirit is a real being. Yes, did you know that? I really had never considered that he was. He was always a mysterious ghost like thing that you called upon to help someone in need.

Tuesday morning in a men’s leadership class our pastor stated that the Holy Spirit will prompt us to act in accordance with his will. We being dough head men will often say nah! This (my) way is better. The spirit will let us proceed, of course, taking us ever further away from his will in our lives. I heard our pastor say (it may have been early, he may not have said this but) the spirit’s feeling would get hurt. Let’s not debate whether this could be true or not. The point of the matter was that somehow God revealed to me that the spirit is one of three important beings in our Triune God. I never considered this, never recognized that I was treating the Holy Spirit as more of a tool than a part of my God.

This evening I prayed to the Holy Spirit to forgive me. I invited him fully into my heart as an equal member of my God. It was a powerful yet humble prayer. I was aware of how much I have missed out on by not recognizing this basic fact, not honoring God fully. Today this changed. I was aware of his presence, a subtle sensation / awareness came over me. I immediately lifted up in prayer several loved ones who I knew to be in need of prayer. With more conviction and release than I have ever known I lifted each up in prayer knowing that this powerful being was listening and would act on this authentic prayer.

Praise you Lord for revealing this ignorance in me so that I might repent of it and connect more powerfully with the Holy Spirit.

I can only imagine what might have been had I recognized this earlier. All those subtle whispered messages over the last number of years. Where had they come from? The Holy Spirit of course. If only I had tapped his power earlier, what good might God have done for his people?

Can you imagine what the Holy Spirit must have been thinking? Here is this dope that sometimes listens to my voice. Sometimes he even acts on what I share with him. All the while he has no idea I am real, I am God. He insults me with his ignorance but still he tries to listen he tries to ask me to act in others. What a knuckle head, maybe one day he will get it! Tuesday was that day. Praise God, Praise you Holy Spirit!

So when you pray, when you ask the Holy Spirit to act in the lives of those you pray for, do you realize he is God a member of the Trinity?

Mark: Point 3

For the past five months I have become a part of my churches outreach into the poorest part of south Fontana California. Each month we set up at a local Christian Church and care for people. I discussed this in detail in the first post on this blog Em-Manuel. It did not take long for this activity to become something I looked forward to. It is to a point now where if something were to conflict with this activity I would decline it. This outreach is too important to be missed. Manuel has become a friend I pray for regularly. David, Don, Dewayne and Mike have all changed me. Getting to know men in humble desperate circumstance leaves its mark.

For me every drop of sweat, every twinge of pain, every word of prayer is magnified. It is a moment of consciousness of my role in the Kingdom of God. It represents my opportunity to be a working healthy part of the body of Christ.

There is more to the story though. I shared a few posts ago of the passion I have been given to lead, this heavenly gift is a calling upon my life. There are two models of leadership I breathe. The first is servant leadership modeled after our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Serving others, making yourself a confident, capable “last” is core to this model. I revel in it, for I know where my strength comes from. Unlike the worldly perspective on this style of leadership, I am no door mat. I say this not out of pride but out of confidence in the Lord and the gifts he bestowed upon me. Would you call Christ a door mat when he tore up the money changers tables in the temple square? Hardly! There is a quiet deep strength in this form of leadership.

The other model of leadership I breathe also originates from my faith; transformational leadership. Helping others to transcend their individual circumstance to achieve something beyond their individual capabilities, this is transformational leadership at its best.

Why do I share these two models with you? Well they relate to the transformation occurring within me. My role as a servant in this activity has created a hunger to do more for God, but it has also lived out the scriptures. My zeal to do God’s will to make myself last has led to an opportunity to take a leadership role in this outreach on behalf of my Church. According to one of our church elders it was the very fact that I served with joy that led him to ask me to help lead. It’s not about me, it is about God being true to his word in Mark. 10:44

Whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of all. Mark 10:44

Please understand I do not seek to be first, actually I am absolutely happy to stay toiling in obscurity. But God will always raise up those who are true to his word. I suppose this happens to be me in this story. Praise God

Father continue your work in me

Guard my heart, protect me from the evil one

I praise your name for the revelation you gave me this week

I praise the Holy Spirit and all he does in this world

Use me fully father to further your kingdom

I am your servant

There is no greater work than to do your will

Use me

In your son's holy name I pray

Amen