Service in Christ

Hey everyone it has been a while. In the past six weeks my focus has wandered and the moments where I had something to write about few. There were many attacks, many diversions many excuses. Yesterday the Lord laid a story on my heart that I need to share. It is about service.

There is a feeling of uncertainty and excitement when you step out into the mission field. It does not occur as you leave your house, as you drive in your car, or as your ego searches for reasons not to show up. It happens the moment you step into the event, the environment, the community. It could be a city park, a homeless shelter, a tent city, a soup kitchen; the venue does not matter it happens every time. The feeling of excitement to know that finally, today, I can forget all the troubles of my world and serve someone else less fortunate then I. Finally I can do God’s work, not in a pay it forward kind of way, no today I get to serve in obscurity. No one other than my small group and the people I touch will ever know I was here. No one that is except the only one who really matters, God.

That same moment you step into the fray you may not know what to do. People swirl around you looking for all the world like they know what they are doing. You have been faithful and showed up but now you need to figure out what to do. You seek a leader someone who has it together and ask for guidance. You are given a role a job to do. Your ego revolts claiming the work is below you. You should have no part in this enterprise. Are there not others who are paid to do this type of work? But then this is ego of course he will revolt. Somewhere in the process the Holy Spirit shows up. He always does. He works a miracle in your heart. He softens it. Soon the tasks that once seemed beneath you now take on a whole new meaning. It is life itself that you are serving, cleaning, sharing, moving; life abundantly as a child of God. You are connected into something supernatural something beyond comprehension. Then there are the miracles. The lives transformed, the friendships started, the people healed, the hungry fed. It happens every time.

You pray for people who are desperate. They do not resist, they do not walk away. No they quiet themselves and allow you to pray for them. The Holy Spirit once again shows up and melts your heart and theirs connecting the two for a moment in time. Some of the people speak no English yet they hear your prayer, they need it, they want it, they are grateful. God shows up and ministers to his people. Somehow the food never runs out, the love continues on and the workers never grow tired. God shows up.

Then comes the jubilation. The prayers of praise for what God has done in our midst. The testimony and witness we provide when we love others unconditionally. There is the life changing profound impact we have on our children as they join us in this labor of love. The afterglow of serving others lasts well into the day, well after the last person has been cared for. It lasts for several days and when your small group meets again the stories of victory in Christ are retold with excitement and wonder. Lives transformed in the community, lives transformed in the small group. God shows up.

So why is it that so few people take the step into the mission field? Why do they smile politely make vague commitments and then find excuses when the time comes. Why do they avoid the topic? Why?

Do they feel unworthy?

Do they feel guilty?

Are they too busy?

Do they have somewhere else to be?

Do they have something more important to do?

I know that for several years I wanted to serve yet I did not make it happen. That is until one day in the spring of 07 when my heart was so heavy at not serving that I drew a line in the sand. In fact as a small group leader I drew it for my small group. I need to serve I told them. I do not care what it is I do but I need to serve, my heart is aching to serve. We have been together a long time and our group has not made this leap of faith. I believe we need to serve together. I believe so strongly that if we cannot find somewhere to serve together I am out. I cannot continue in this group without serving with you guys somewhere. That is how my men’s group came to be a part of the Fontana Adopt a Block event. Faithfully for 13 months my group has packed food, prayed, served food, prayed some more, met the poor, helped the poor. We are richly blessed to be a part of this important ministry. Our group has blossomed ever since growing to three times the size it was only a year ago. This Easter we impacted the lives of over one thousand people in south Fontana. God showed up in our community, God showed up in group.

Last week my other small group stepped out in faith to serve at the clothing ministry. Once again that familiar twinge of excitement and uncertainty was present as I crossed the threshold. Today we would take dust covered boxes of donated clothes sort through them. Some items would go to the store others would be donated to the Mexico ministry. As I surveyed the wall of 2 year old donated boxes a question pierced my heart. Why did these donations meant to bless others have to sit for so long unsorted. How many poor people might have benefited from a warm coat, a blanket, a pair of shoes, a dress? We will never know.

My mind flashed back to a question that had haunted me the first day I arrived at the Adopt A Block outreach thirteen months prior; where are all the people from Water of Life?

Who are you serving…

"The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore ask the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.” Luke 10:2

No prayer father only heartache for your people

I love you

amen

A house divided cannot stand

“A house divided against itself cannot stand” Matthew 12:25

I love the way the Lord brings clarity forth. Over the past few weeks this verse continues to come up in conversation and in prayer. In my men’s group we discussed the importance of being united in Christ and with each other if we are ever to claim victory over the schemes of the enemy. At a recent Sunday night service at my church a guest pastor brought forth a clear teaching on the importance of unity in the body and prayed over the congregation that the bonds of shame be broken and lifted from our midst.

It grieves me that there are so many men who are isolated, alone and unable to reach out for the camaraderie they so desperately need to be whole in Christ. If only every man knew that we must be united to overcome the schemes of the devil. If only every man knew what this meant and how to be an authentic Christian man. How can a man share the shame of failure of another drink, another drug, another pornographic website, another angry outburst if he has no brothers to help him through it in love. The moment he gives into temptation the devil convicts him, holds him down with a Jackboot on his neck in the dirt rendering yet another brother helpless in the cause of Christ.

This verse speaks to me of the battle we are in, the criticality of the cause and the hope we have in Christ. I share it with you in hope that it might stir the conversation and through prayer and thanksgiving that we might discover God’s calling for men of Christ.

May God bless you

May his face shine upon you

Amen

Be encouraged my brothers in Christ

Tis the Season...

Christmas…

For all the significance this event has, for all the wonder that is Christ, I struggle with Christmas.

I would really like to understand why. When I am done with this post I will pray about this very thing.

Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel. Is 7:14

I love the Old Testament prophesy announcing the virgin birth. I love all the wonder associated with the Lord Jesus Christ. I often want to find a way to make Christmas worship more meaningful. I want to thank God for the miraculous gift of his son.

All the while the world swirls around me and my family. The pervasiveness of consumerism is oppressive. Buy this, indulge in that, no payments for 90 days, credit trouble we can finance you, spend spend spend.

This is not what Christmas is about.

I want a Christmas where Christ is central. I want a Christmas where we wake up on Christmas morning and pray first. I want a Christmas where the glory and honor go to God not to man.

I am not big on Christmas carols. I struggled with this for some time. Fortunately I have learned that it is not that I do not like carols. It is just that I am frustrated with the same ones over and over and over and over and over. You get the point.

Last Christmas out of frustration, I purchased a Mercy Me Christmas CD. It was a mix of older songs sung their way and their own music. I loved it. This year my wife and I purchased a Jars of Clay Christmas CD, I love it too.

Praise God I can honor him in song with music I love that does not seem tired and old.

There are some things I like about the season. I eagerly anticipate this months Adopt a Block Saturday. Sharing the season of life and giving with those in need, now that is exciting! Of course I do this every month though. I look forward to meeting with my small groups and basking in our friendships, celebrating the season. I look forward to spending time with family and friends reinforcing the love that exists between us. I look forward to reaching out to old lost friends and strangers and the hope of new or renewed relationships.

What will bring me a true sense of joy in this season? Worship? Giving? Service? Time with family? New traditions? Old traditions? All these will play a role I am sure.

What works for you? How do you put Christ in Christmas?

I think it is time I prayed…

He Speaks

You know when I was just coming back to the faith I struggled with those who claimed supernatural intervention. Healings, conversations with God, speaking in tongues all these things used to make me extremely uncomfortable. Frankly most who claimed them I secretly thought were either quacks or at least a lot out of balance.

I think it was a combination of three factors that kept me from seeing God in these events. First I was a skeptic. As I reflect back on my skepticism now I realize this was actually an attack, a diversion. After all if these events were real and I could see it, how could my faith not be deepened. Second was fear. Again it goes like the old confrontational question either Christ was real or he was insane. He is real of course just so if these events were real then how could my faith in Christ not grow deeper. It seemed easier to resist this than embrace things I did not yet understand. Finally these events never happened to me. As an engineer, taught in the tradition of worldly science, I had no evidence to support the hypothesis. How then could it be objectively considered and proven, it could not.

So there I was a relatively naïve and new Christian trying to come to terms with things beyond my ability to process. Yet there was hope in Christ. It seems that the Holy Spirit had a remedial course in supernatural science planned for me. It started with a great kicking the gut. He revealed to me that there was an emptiness in my soul where only God could fit.

So in case there are any non Christians reading this let me state clearly that I have been extremely blessed. All of the usual arguments of how I could fall for Christianity fall short here. In worldly terms I am not weak, I am not unintelligent, and I am not unsuccessful. In heavenly terms I yes, consider myself all these things (weak, unintelligent, unsuccessful). May God be praised and receive all the glory for through his grace these are all washed away. For it is not about me. At all. I would rather be judged a fool by men than a fool by God. Got Christ? Only one answer is not foolish to this question.

Anyway, he kicked me in the gut, woke me up. He then started to reveal to me in very small glimpses his presence in my life. I have learned that he has always been there, waiting patently for me. These glimpses would come as improbable coincidence. A word spoken by multiple unrelated people into my life, a sermon that echoed a conversation held the previous day, a book found randomly that spoke to exactly what troubled me in the faith. For 10 years now these "coincidences" have continued. I recall after about three years feeling this sense that I needed to open myself up further to the holy spirit yet knowing that I was not ready. Surrender. I would learn later that even then I knew I had to surrender to my Lord.

The story continued a Men's bible study conducted over a one year period spoke the heart of the faith to me as each week revealed clearly theme after theme of the faith. Serving in leadership at my church taught me about selflessness and revealed my own lack of the same. Small groups taught me about the importance of love and community in the faith.

All these seemingly separate concepts kept coming together. Finally prayer, sorrowful, lonely prayers brought new friends into my life. Intercessory prayers for healing from cancer were answered. Prayers for deliverance from life's challenges answered. Prayers of self surrender answered with unimaginable opportunity.

So as I sit here now writing this post, I am aware of the transformation in my heart. When people speak in tongues, get healed, speak supernaturally, now I praise God for his revelation, his grace his kindness. No longer do I question whether it is real but how lasting the impact will be.

Does God Speak? Yes.

Father I praise you for your kindness, your mercy your intervention

I praise you for your patience

For waiting on me to get it

For your faithfulness

May I serve you in love always

Amen

The Trip Part II

This post was a mysterious journey for me. I started out with the idea of explaining why Jeremiah 29:13 was so meaningful to me and found myself having a brief but intense discussion with our heavenly father. The discussion and this post ended when someone seated next to me reached out to say hello. Little did I know that he was lost and in need of my help. Anyway here is the post as it was. This was an intense and powerful few moments that humbled me. In The Trip IV I will share a bit about the gentleman who reached out to me and in some future post the rest of the Jeremiah 29:13 story.

May God bless and keep you, may his face shine upon you.

Here is the post.

Jeremiah 29:13

In 2002 I had the pleasure of being a part of my first ever bible study. In this critical time in my walk I had the honor of having Fred, Chris, Raynor and Nick speak into my life in a profound way. Each of these men became a mentor of sorts as we dove into the books of the bible together. By far the most memorable book was Jeremiah. Most people may consider Jeremiah to be a dark and pessimistic book. I found it to be the most poignant revelation of the heart of God in the bible. Throughout the book you could feel the massive disappointment the Lord felt toward his chosen people. A people he had nurtured for over a thousand years. A father who became... [[At this point I was at a loss for words and prayed to God to help me finish the story, give me the right word Father, Allow me to honor you with these words. I got a different response.]] As I write this I feel the power of God saying Stop! What you want to write is no longer true. You cannot say I have lost my connection. Do not talk about the past. Instead LISTEN to the song on your IPOD

Michael W Smith sings…

Help me find the way to bring me back to you

You are all I want you are all I ever needed

Help me know you are near

Father I am humbled as I sit and try with all my heart to honor you by writing about your scriptures your holy verse you speak to me a story of hope of victory through your son Jesus Christ.

I am stunned by this revelation; our heavenly father has not spoken to me this clearly before. Just then the song on my Ipod ends and another randomly begins. (Note I often set my Ipod to shuffle and listen to songs at random it can be a fun game to see where it will go next) The next song is by Kutless, the song “Saved” I hear…

I tell you now its the only way 

To be set free from all your pain 

You must accept these words I say 

I need your focus just this day 

Let me reveal to you a friend 

He’ll give you purpose and eternal life 

He is the Christ and to Him I say 

I am speechless.

Praise be to you almighty father

Amen

If I am saved by grace, why do I still sin?

Sin

If I am saved by grace, why do I still sin?

Father, forgive me for I have sinned…

As a child I must have started this prayer of contrition a thousand times, usually with a Priest on the other side of a veiled confessional. I grew up this way, telling a Priest what I had done wrong, receiving prayers and acts of penance. Each time, while I felt intellectually freer, I never felt clean never felt washed in Christ’s gift of grace.

Why was that?

I think at the root of the problem is the conflict of my carnal and spiritual natures. In my heart and soul I hate sin. Yet as a human I seem to be unable to escape my carnal nature. Each time I sin I beg forgiveness I claim my inheritance in Christ, his grace and resolve to turn away to repent from those acts which separate me from him.

Create in me a clean heart Oh God and renew my spirit

Deep within me I know that Christ is doing a work in me. He is transforming me. One day I hope to be changed enough that I will begin to reflect his glory and not my small self. I see my heart and it is stained black with sin, but through the cross these stains are being moved toward the edges dissipating, lessening. One day the darkness of the edges will be all that is left, another day I will have a clean heart, a heart totally committed and devoted to God. The darkness inside will be brought to the light. While the darkness tries to hide, it will fail. All will be made light. God please speed up your work on my heart I am so tired of failing.

I find some solace in the book of Romans, particularly the end of chapter 7 and the start of 8. I know deep in my soul that the answers to my struggles lie in these verses.

Romans 7: 15-25 8: 1-3
15I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

21So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. 22For in my inner being I delight in God's law; 23but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. 24What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? 25Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.

8:1Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. 3For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering.

I see in Paul’s words that I am not alone in this battle. Most importantly my stumbles are not fatal. As I have my hope and salvation in Christ Jesus my savior, I cannot be condemned. My salvation is a gift of grace through the resurrection of Christ. Here in lies my theology, I am not worthy of it, I cannot earn it, it was freely given to me out of a sacrifice of love.

Father deliver me
Wash me clean
Only your grace and love can cleanse me
I need you today more than ever
The battle rages but my hope is in you
That you will deliver me from this hell
That you will carry me through this
Father deliver me
I am before you in the dust
I am not worthy father
Heal me
Deliver me

In your sons victorious name I call on you to deliver me

Amen

Em-Manuel

A few days ago I had the opportunity to work with a small but dedicated group in south Fontana. Perhaps you have never heard of south Fontana. It is a hot arid place on the edge of the deserts of southern California. Here you find blistering heat in the summer and poverty year round. This is a place of desperation. This is a place where generations of Americans go without health care; without most of the things that you and I hardly think about. Here people consider where their next meal will come from and whether they should eat or pay their rent. This is a place of desperation.

When I was sick…

For one day each month this changes. A small group of Christ followers congregate at a local church and do their level best to serve these same people. A mobile medical unit comes and sets up shop providing basic medical care for all who show up. They work tirelessly all day ensuring that these people see the hope of Christ through their eyes.

When I was hungry…

Our group brings in a truck full of food. I have the pleasure of organizing the packing of 100 boxes of food for the people. There are so many wonderful moments in this time. Each moment is a blessing, everything from small aches of joy in the small of my back, to the electricity of the opening prayer, to the intimacy of listening to a hurting broken brother or sister. I praise God for the opportunity to be in these moments fully alive for him and his church.

When I was lonely…

There are games, music, puppet shows, bouncers for the kids. This is a time for community to be built and strengthened, a time for new bonds of friendship to be planted.

Go amongst all the nations and proclaim the good news…

This day I asked a new friend "Manuel" a question. Do you believe that Christ died for you and loves you? Any evangelist worth his weight in salt might think this is no big thing. It was, Saturday marked the first time, praise God, that I asked another person this question. At least the first person where the answer was not known. The Lord is doing a work inside my heart. He is opening me up to the lonely and the poor, he is gracing me with a glimpse of his ability to see his people as he does.

Speak Lord for your servant is listening…

Father I praise you, I love you and I thank you. I ask that you open the eyes of all the peoples of this earth to the suffering, pain and loneliness that surrounds them like a sea. I ask that you bless them and teach them to see how they can make a difference for you. Father I pray that you will use me fully, make me a vessel of your peace of your grace and healing. Here I am father use me.

In your son’s victorious name I pray

Amen